6 Ways to Help Your Kids Grieve

Source: 6 Ways to Help Your Kids Grieve

IIn today’s Family Minute, we talked about communicating with our kids when they’re hurting. If you’re like me, when you see your kids hurt, it hurts you. But even when it hurts, we need to be there for our children and be the rock they can hold on to in times of uncertainty and pain.

They are difficult subjects, but death and divorce are two things that are very difficult for our children to understand.

How can we help our children grieve?

In her book, family author Sandra P. Aldrich provides the following guidelines for talking to your children about traumatic issues such as death and divorce: Encouragement for busy moms: “Honey, hang in there!”

Don’t lie about the situation.

To protect their children from the truth, many parents defuse the situation by making up explanations such as “Grandma is on a long trip” or “We took the dog to a farm.” But according to the author: “These are not just lies, they shift the need to tell the truth that the grandmother died or the father left.”

Know what your child can handle.

While the author warns against lying to protect your children, she also warns against revealing too much. Know what your children can understand and handle for their age and temperament. For example, if there has been a divorce, the children do not need to know the details of adultery or other serious issues. But be prepared to listen to your children’s questions. You’ll probably have a hard time understanding them, but responding with “I don’t want to talk about it” will only put a wall between you and your child.

Let your children express their feelings.

Unfortunately, many adults who find it difficult to deal with their own feelings of loss suppress these painful feelings, thereby encouraging the same process in their children. Encourage your children to share their feelings and express their emotions in healthy ways. Not only will this aid in the healing process, but it will also help develop skills in dealing with stress and trauma in the future. Be sure to validate your children by letting them express their feelings. Don’t belittle her for feelings like anger or guilt, let her know that her feelings are normal.

Ask your children how they are doing.

Don’t assume that your child is good at handling things because he doesn’t cry or ask questions often. You never know what kind of self-doubt or worry is going on in their minds. Make sure you ask your kids if they have questions or want to talk about their feelings.

Prepare for guilt.

Many children take responsibility for the loss of a loved one. Whether through divorce or death, children can secretly blame themselves. Make sure your kids know the situation isn’t their fault.

Concentrate on your children.

Often, a parent’s grief over the loss of a spouse or loved one causes them to withdraw from others, including their children. But when you and your children have suffered a great loss, now more than ever they need you for emotional support and guidance. If necessary, seek the help of a friend or professional counselor to help manage the grieving process. Ask friends and family for practical help if you’re a single parent and can’t cope with daily chores.

In summary, Aldrich encourages parents by saying, “Speaking and listening to children during these times not only recognizes their grief, but also reaffirms their importance within the family.”

I would like to know your opinion on this topic. Please don’t hesitate to comment below.

Via: toplistreviewstoday.com

from toplistreviewstoday.com https://ift.tt/xhvM6E4
via Toplistreviewstoday.com